This isn't even it
If you're affected with denial and fears,
if you sleep under the shadows of tears,
if you play the same pity song over again,
and your future self finds you and kills you and then,
your not really there, just a substance like air,
you search for someone you think will care,
but they don't and it doesn't seem fair.
If you could cut through my skull to my head,
and read all the things I've done and I've said,
you would hate me and wish I was dead.
Yet if you could feel the things that I do,
unexplainable emotions that seem to ensue,
they pressure my mind into thinking I'm through,
then maybe just maybe you'd get a glimpse.
Feelings of joy mixed in with doubt,
then feelings of worthlessness that seem to shout,
until all your feelings of love just fall out.
Betrayed by one you though you could trust,
stabbed in the heart where you bleed out disgust,
you've collected over time and has now gathered dust.
I could continue, complaining of life,
and how it's unfair, and only gives strife,
I could try and explain how I feel, but it confuses even me,
and you still would not get it, you still wouldn't see.
I've tried what I could to show you inside,
but this doesn't even do justice to why I have sighed.
if you sleep under the shadows of tears,
if you play the same pity song over again,
and your future self finds you and kills you and then,
your not really there, just a substance like air,
you search for someone you think will care,
but they don't and it doesn't seem fair.
If you could cut through my skull to my head,
and read all the things I've done and I've said,
you would hate me and wish I was dead.
Yet if you could feel the things that I do,
unexplainable emotions that seem to ensue,
they pressure my mind into thinking I'm through,
then maybe just maybe you'd get a glimpse.
Feelings of joy mixed in with doubt,
then feelings of worthlessness that seem to shout,
until all your feelings of love just fall out.
Betrayed by one you though you could trust,
stabbed in the heart where you bleed out disgust,
you've collected over time and has now gathered dust.
I could continue, complaining of life,
and how it's unfair, and only gives strife,
I could try and explain how I feel, but it confuses even me,
and you still would not get it, you still wouldn't see.
I've tried what I could to show you inside,
but this doesn't even do justice to why I have sighed.